Life Goes On

Well, like I said, it's been a very rough couple of weeks for me.

Just recently, my best friends' mother, Ildiko Eva Jokay, passed away.

I've known them, and her, since I was about five.

It's only been just over a week, and I'm starting to come out of my fog now.

When Andrea called me that day and said that if I wanted to say my goodbyes I should come...no one thought that she'd leave us within the next hour and a half.

Moments ago, I found a picture of the two of us...very precious, really.

It's not all of the girls (me, Christina and Andrea) and her...it's just us.

I'm not ashamed of being a little selfish here.
I love her dearly.

I will never use the past tense with her.

She will always be beautiful, elegant, graceful, perfect...everything that I thought I never really was.

She also ALWAYS ribbed me about never having a sufficient jacket, coat, or car-di-gan.

For those of you reading this who were lucky enough to be enamoured by that sing-song accent, you know what I mean.

My last words to her were, in fact, "I love you, and I'll always have a jacket on."

Wouldn't you know it? As I drove home after her passing, I was crying, banging on my steering wheel, and freezing...I didn't bring a sweater.

I have since re-organized my closet, and paired every jacket I have with the appropriate belt - in her memory, I will always be warm, and ALWAYS be prepared to take on the best-dressed list.

She'd expect nothing less.

Szeretlek, Ildiko.

Night all.